Thursday, January 20, 2011
day....o wait, the semester began!
well, its not that i havent been workin out, its that blogging is not on the priority now that the semester has begun! i knew this day would come! im still treckin along. the 5k is on the 29th, a lil over a week away. im unsure if ill be able to jog the whole thing, but i will complete it for sure! i dont know how much i weigh, but i dont really care. i feel great, im eating healthy, exercising, and my clothes are fitting loosely. God is good, and thats all that matters, i am content. :)
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Day 26
time to catch up on the blogs....
this i was Thursday: around 3:30pm i hadnt done my workout for the day yet, and i was dreading it. it had come to the point where i just wasnt really sure if i was doing anything correctly...so i spontaneously called a physical trainer in Dothan at Golds Gym. When i met with him, we went over goals i have and i shared with him about my quest for health, and the recent weeks with Biggest Loser. He got really confused when i said that in 4 years i have lost 50 lbs and quickly informed me that though it is a process, it should not be that long of a process ever and said in 12 months he could help me lose all the weight i needed to. He had me do a work out just to show him where my strengths and weaknesses are.
Now in the Work Out DVD's you do ALOT of squats, lunges, and variations of the two. i was kinda disheartened to find out that my form was completely wrong for the squats and slightly wrong for the lunges(at least the backward ones...front lunges he said i was doing perfectly!)
and the work out he had me do, there wasnt much too it but it felt more effective then any session on the biggest loser dvd's. i guess it could be because i am not monitored or challenged by the dvd's, they can't see me to correct my form or push me to my limit and left alone, i guess i tend to ease on myself and not push as hard as i could.
A combination of exhaustion and frustration, i spent the majority of that night feeling defeated to know that in 4 weeks i have not really accomplished as much as i thought. I dont know if going to the PT was mistake, in some ways it was good. in someways not so good. Im having to filter through all we discussed to hold onto what is worth holding onto.
It was a humbling experience, i felt like he had to correct EVERYTHING i was doing. but I am going to take from this what i need to. A. dont use momentum, focus and use the muscles needed. b. Build muscle, it will burn more throughout the day and night and always instead of just sitting there. c. i can do this, i need to keep telling myself to keep going.
I found out that every exercise is a core excercise because you have to have a strong core throughout the entire thing inorder to stabalize and support your back and maintain balance.
If i am going to do this whole losing weight thing, i want to do it correctly. with no chase for relapse, i want to build muscle and not cause harm to my joints.
I am unsure if i will be able to do the 5K on the 29th, the PT said i still have too much weight on me still and it could harm my knees and hips and other joints. But i still want to keep doing the light jog that i do around the school. just walking is boring and not challenging...and the jog, its like an instant gratification or notification to me that ive just done something!
There are a couple students here that i know work out in the gym enough to know for sure what is proper form and such so i am going to pray about asking for thier help, because PT's are rather expensive and its a 45min drive to them. not good with gas as expensive as it is right now.
this i was Thursday: around 3:30pm i hadnt done my workout for the day yet, and i was dreading it. it had come to the point where i just wasnt really sure if i was doing anything correctly...so i spontaneously called a physical trainer in Dothan at Golds Gym. When i met with him, we went over goals i have and i shared with him about my quest for health, and the recent weeks with Biggest Loser. He got really confused when i said that in 4 years i have lost 50 lbs and quickly informed me that though it is a process, it should not be that long of a process ever and said in 12 months he could help me lose all the weight i needed to. He had me do a work out just to show him where my strengths and weaknesses are.
Now in the Work Out DVD's you do ALOT of squats, lunges, and variations of the two. i was kinda disheartened to find out that my form was completely wrong for the squats and slightly wrong for the lunges(at least the backward ones...front lunges he said i was doing perfectly!)
and the work out he had me do, there wasnt much too it but it felt more effective then any session on the biggest loser dvd's. i guess it could be because i am not monitored or challenged by the dvd's, they can't see me to correct my form or push me to my limit and left alone, i guess i tend to ease on myself and not push as hard as i could.
A combination of exhaustion and frustration, i spent the majority of that night feeling defeated to know that in 4 weeks i have not really accomplished as much as i thought. I dont know if going to the PT was mistake, in some ways it was good. in someways not so good. Im having to filter through all we discussed to hold onto what is worth holding onto.
It was a humbling experience, i felt like he had to correct EVERYTHING i was doing. but I am going to take from this what i need to. A. dont use momentum, focus and use the muscles needed. b. Build muscle, it will burn more throughout the day and night and always instead of just sitting there. c. i can do this, i need to keep telling myself to keep going.
I found out that every exercise is a core excercise because you have to have a strong core throughout the entire thing inorder to stabalize and support your back and maintain balance.
If i am going to do this whole losing weight thing, i want to do it correctly. with no chase for relapse, i want to build muscle and not cause harm to my joints.
I am unsure if i will be able to do the 5K on the 29th, the PT said i still have too much weight on me still and it could harm my knees and hips and other joints. But i still want to keep doing the light jog that i do around the school. just walking is boring and not challenging...and the jog, its like an instant gratification or notification to me that ive just done something!
There are a couple students here that i know work out in the gym enough to know for sure what is proper form and such so i am going to pray about asking for thier help, because PT's are rather expensive and its a 45min drive to them. not good with gas as expensive as it is right now.
Week Four: Recap
This was a toughy for me. just read the blogs before this.
but i started the week at 205, ending it at 202. a small victory, but ill take it.
Please pray for me: that i can focus more on communicating with the Lord and less worried about what the Scale says. This is a big week as i start the new job and welcome 9 new girls into the dorm as well as needing to effectively lead and enter the craziness of life while still finding the ability to maintain my goals of living healthy.
but i started the week at 205, ending it at 202. a small victory, but ill take it.
Please pray for me: that i can focus more on communicating with the Lord and less worried about what the Scale says. This is a big week as i start the new job and welcome 9 new girls into the dorm as well as needing to effectively lead and enter the craziness of life while still finding the ability to maintain my goals of living healthy.
Day 28
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---------------------------UPDATE on APRIL 5, 2012----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
In this entry, you will find that I once participated in Yoga. I have since ceased doing thisbecause I believe that it is not honoring to the Lord. If you would like to read why, please go to this blog entry. As the Holy Spirit continues renewing my mind with His truth, I pray to be able to respond with obedience so that the name of Jesus Christ is honored and glorified by not only my words, but actions as well.
Saturday:
again, did not do the video. ill go back to it soon. its just a frustrating thing and im slowly working through it. but i went on another walk/jog with the dog. and did some yoga to stretch out my muscles...still sore.
internally im still frustrated with stuff, but i cant let that stop me. i have to keep going. with all the PT had told me floating around in my head, and all the feeling of being embarrassed by how much i was doing wrong and how little i was able to do, my mind keeps analysizing it over and over, its been distracting me so bad i havent even been able to do a legit quiet time. but i had enough of that last night, before i went to bed i just word vomitted all over my journal. starting from a passage i was reading in Nehemiah, talking about it and how it was connecting for me, and then a tangent came and i flowed with that. i don't know if i have hashed it all out yet with the Lord.
Ive got the Pelt's in my mind now, whenever i think about giving up. Thanks Tracee and Jason for talking me off my "ledge" the other night. The Lord is really useing your words to help me keep going and not stop.
PS: Why did this, such an essencial thing to living, have to be a way for Satan to possibly have a foothold. ordinarily, if i see an area that has this possibility, i would chunk it out of my life... cant really chuck out food or excersize from my life though...thats just asking for defeat. but it needs to not be SO prevelent in my mind!
Day 27
Friday:
Did not do the video.
what was going through my head was "whats the use, im not doing any of it correctly".
so instead i went on a walk/jog with a friend's dog. 2.5 miles.
fyi, my core and every muscle the PT told me he was having me workout was SORE! My core has NEVER been that sore before!
it was a good feeling.
Did not do the video.
what was going through my head was "whats the use, im not doing any of it correctly".
so instead i went on a walk/jog with a friend's dog. 2.5 miles.
fyi, my core and every muscle the PT told me he was having me workout was SORE! My core has NEVER been that sore before!
it was a good feeling.
Thursday, January 6, 2011
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Day 25
i knew i had to workout, even if i still felt icky. In my mind, i get more and more freaked out about the 5k coming in 3 weeks from the Saturday (which i still have to register for...keep forgetting). i keep thinking in my head that there is no way im gonna be ready to jog the entire thing by then. and in those moments i want to just throw in the towel because i doubt that i can ever come to that point. well, it may not work everyday, but today i pushed that aside and did the Cardio: Level 2. if i dont even try, then i have failed already.
I found my mind wanting to give up today. i ended up Praying/yelling during the workout, half to silence my mind from discouraging myself, and half to ask God to a. help me and b. why i was feeling this way.
im thinking about throwing my scale away. when the numbers are decreasing, it is encouraging. when it doesnt say what i would like it to say i get frustrated, especially when i know how hard ive worked at it. and instead of it being something to push me to do better, i just feel defeated. So whats the deal with numbers anyway? why is it so important to me to weigh one pound less? Why am i not satisfied with feeling healthy? Who determines that magic number? What happens when i get to that number that i think i should be at...? will i be satisfied then?
Im struggling with the spiritual aspect of this. am i becoming obsessed? has this gone from bringing Glory to God to glory to self?
I don't know.
ps. i dont want to give up like i have in the past.
I found my mind wanting to give up today. i ended up Praying/yelling during the workout, half to silence my mind from discouraging myself, and half to ask God to a. help me and b. why i was feeling this way.
im thinking about throwing my scale away. when the numbers are decreasing, it is encouraging. when it doesnt say what i would like it to say i get frustrated, especially when i know how hard ive worked at it. and instead of it being something to push me to do better, i just feel defeated. So whats the deal with numbers anyway? why is it so important to me to weigh one pound less? Why am i not satisfied with feeling healthy? Who determines that magic number? What happens when i get to that number that i think i should be at...? will i be satisfied then?
Im struggling with the spiritual aspect of this. am i becoming obsessed? has this gone from bringing Glory to God to glory to self?
I don't know.
ps. i dont want to give up like i have in the past.
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
day 24
2 things for this day.
1. i wanted to get back on my schedule or Tuesdays and Saturdays rest seeing as i have this week and next week before the semester starts.
2. i just felt icky all day and tired.
so i didnt workout. i walked a dog and played around with it in a field, though.
1. i wanted to get back on my schedule or Tuesdays and Saturdays rest seeing as i have this week and next week before the semester starts.
2. i just felt icky all day and tired.
so i didnt workout. i walked a dog and played around with it in a field, though.
Monday, January 3, 2011
Week Three: Recap
Most intense workout week of the journey yet. 5 straight days. cardio dvd one day, powersculpt and jog the next. Cardio on Wednesday, Powersculpt and Jog on Thursday and friday powersculpt no jog. with the holidays, it has been hard to get in the workouts and not eat too many sweets. but i think i have done well. I believe i have made the better of choices in what and when i eat, and have stayed hydrated and found the time to workout. so why is it that the scale says there is an increase of 5 lbs on the scale? i have a few theories, (sorry to any guys who may be reading this but the is a journal with honesty of this journey), its that time of month. i hear the body retains alot of water during this time, but is it really 5 lbs worth? i mean, i feel great. i feel healthy, that is, the great part not so much currently, 1st day is always the roughest.
I also havent been able to accurately record my meals this past week because its been sparatic and busy, i may have eaten more than i think i did, though when i think on it, i know i only ate when i was hungary and i kept it natural and healthy choices, maintaining serving size.
There was more intensity in the workouts, did gain muscle?
these are possibilities. Cant let the numbers discourage me, though i wish this process would speed up...
I also havent been able to accurately record my meals this past week because its been sparatic and busy, i may have eaten more than i think i did, though when i think on it, i know i only ate when i was hungary and i kept it natural and healthy choices, maintaining serving size.
There was more intensity in the workouts, did gain muscle?
these are possibilities. Cant let the numbers discourage me, though i wish this process would speed up...
Day 23
The Journey back to Graceville began at 10am(eastern) and ended a 2:30pm(central).
its 11:30 pm, and ive been so busy today i havent been able to stop long enough to think about working out, and i am sitting here just worn out from the travel and crazy day, unwinding to a movie.
is it bad for me to skip the workout tonight?
its 11:30 pm, and ive been so busy today i havent been able to stop long enough to think about working out, and i am sitting here just worn out from the travel and crazy day, unwinding to a movie.
is it bad for me to skip the workout tonight?
Sunday, January 2, 2011
Day 22
I left Winterhaven Sunday after church and lunch. as i drove down the highway, i realized i was super close to the Long's so i gave them a ring and headed their way for the night. Was not able to do my Biggest Loser workout, but Amanda and i went on a brisk walk around a nearby neighborhood and around thier apartment complex.
Twas an excelent night with great friends and i enjoyed every minute of this spontaneous evening!
Twas an excelent night with great friends and i enjoyed every minute of this spontaneous evening!
Saturday, January 1, 2011
Day 21
Today was the 2nd of my rest days for the week. i spent the night prior ringing in the new year with my friend and her family in Winter Haven, FL. We slept in til about 10:30 and had lunch as a big family. took a starch induced nap that afternoon and then walked around downtown Disney for hours that night! twas great!
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