Cause the Saints of Old can say it better-->True vs. False Friendship

Words of Wisdom Worthy of Notice:
From "Introduction to the Devout Life" By: St. Francis de Sales
The Difference Between True and False Friendship


"Take notice, my child, that the honey of Heraclyum, which is so poisonous, altogether resembles that which is wholesome, and there is great danger of mistaking one for the other, or of mixing them, for the virtue of one would not counteract the harmfulness of the other. We must be on our guard not to be deceived in making friendships, especially between persons of the opposite sexes, for not unfrequently Satan deludes those who love one another. They may begin with a virtuous affection, but if discretion be lacking, frivolity will creep in, and then sensuality, till their love becomes carnal: even in spiritual love there is a danger if people are not on the watch, although it is not so easy to be deluded therein, inasmuch as the very purity and transparency of spiritual affection show Satan's stains more promptly. Consequently, when he seeks to interpose, he does it stealthily, and strives to insinuate impurity almost imperceptibly.
You may distinguish between worldly friendship and that which is good and holy, just as one distinguishes that poisonous honey from what is good--it is sweeter to the taste than ordinary honey, owing to the aconite infused;-- and so worldly friendship is profuse in honeyed words, passionate endearments, commendations of beauty and sensual charms, while true friendship speaks a simple honest language, lauding nought save the Grace of God, its one only foundation. That strange honey causes giddiness; and so false friendship upsets the mind, makes its victim to totter in the ways of purity and devotion, inducing affected, mincing looks, sensual caresses, inordinate sighings, petty complaints of not being loved, slight but questionable familiarities, gallantries, embraces, and the like, which are sure precursors of evil; whereas true friendship is modest and straightforward in every glance, loving and pure in caresses, has no sighs save for Heaven, no complaints save that God is not loved sufficiently. That honey confuses the sight, and worldly friendship confuses the judgment, so that men think themselves right while doing evil, and assume their excuses and pretexts to be valid reasoning. They fear the light and love darkness; but true friendship is clear-sighted, and hides nothing--rather seeks to be seen of good men. Lastly, this poisonous honey leaves an exceeding bitter taste behind; and so false friendship turns to evil desires, upbraidings, slander, deceit, sorrow, confusion and jealousies, too often ending in downright sin; but pure friendship is always the same--modest, courteous and loving--knowing no change save an increasingly pure and perfect union, a type of the blessed friendships of Heaven.
When young people indulge in looks, words or actions which they would not like to be seen by their parents, husbands or confessors, it is a sure sign that they are damaging their conscience and their honour. Our Lady was troubledwhen the Angel appeared to her in human form, because she was alone, and he spoke to her with flattering although heavenly words. O Saviour of the world, if purity itself fears an Angel in human shape, how much more need that our impurity should fear men, although they take the likeness of an Angel, if they speak words of earthliness and sensuality!"

...Can I Be Free of This Unreleasable Sin?

Completely haphazardly, as I was exploring the contents of my External Hardrive (which I recommend for anyone who does not have one of these to get one! They save so much space for your computer to run smoother and to keep your documents safe!), I came across this journal entry/freestyle poem I wrote last year...
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February 23, 2011

"Because I've known no other self,

should this refrain me from moving forward?

what if this forward motion would change everything?

should i pursue such uncertainty?

is it fear that holds me from going forward?

is it fear that has glued me to this mark?

Is it a lack of determination?

Is it laziness?

how can i rise above?

Can i break out of this never ending cycle?

What holds me back?

What is it within that limits me like a rubber band,

able to stretch and grow only to snap right back to what it was before,"

______________________________
During this time, I was in a serious point of what I have formerly liked to refer to as my "quest for health," but have since realized is the process of learning how to CRAVE God, not food. And I was apparently not in a very rosy season of the process.
Getting healthy, losing weight... these are things that have deeper roots than mere pounds to shed or inches to lose.
At the core of this process is a battle. It is one of flesh versus Spirit. A battle to turn to the Lord for comfort, for everything, instead of food. In fact, a book I recently came across, written by Lysa TerKeurst, sums it up just in its title: Made To Crave: Satisfying Your Deepest Desires with God Not Food. This journal entry above is the raw guts which flowed from one of many heart to heart moments with the Lord from throughout this journey.
As I read through these words, I am reminded of Romans 7, and of Pauls own battle of flesh and Spirit. His will vs. God's will.
"For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate."
(Romans 7:15 ESV)
Ok, GREAT! He relates, now what?
Well, as you continue reading in Romans 7...
"For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out." (Romans 7:18 ESV)
We can see from this that we, ourselves do not have the ability to do what is right, truly. Read of the sweet victory, and in whom that sweet victory is solely found in...
"So I find it to be a law that when I want to do right, evil lies close at hand. For I delight in the law of God, in my inner being, but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members. Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind, but with my flesh I serve the law of sin."
(Romans 7:21-25 ESV)
and (at risk of losing any semblance of maturity), a song from long ago in my "Punk/Pop Rock" days still flows through my mind in moments of doubt, as if to be a reminder to "...never underestimate my Jesus. You're telling me that there's no hope, I'm telling you you're wrong. never underestimate my Jesus, when the world around you crumbles He will be strong." (Relient K)
So, if you can identify with Paul and I with this tension of flesh vs. Spirit...if it has ever dragged you down, beaten you up, left you for dead, discouraged, etc. Be encouraged!  You are not alone. and Praise Jesus for the VICTORY He has ALREADY accomplished on our behalf!  
Take one more look at that last verse with me. "So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind..."   If we are to serve the law of God with our minds, then we will recognize the importance of renewing our minds (Romans 12:1-2) and also see how this is done by "taking every thought captive to obey Christ." (2 Cor. 10:5)  (More on this in a future post, so stay tuned...) BUT Bluntly stated---> To serve the law of God with our minds we have to know the law of God.

So. CLAIM the Victory we ALREADY have in Christ, and get to reading HIS WORD!!!  Just practically, start with one or 2 verses that can be your "fighter verse."  
I'll close this with one last statement, this one is by Piper, may it serve to remind you of our adversary, the devil, and swiftly direct you to the only "force" Satan cannot reckon with. God's Word.
 "Memorizing Scripture allows me to hit the devil in the face, with a force he cannot resist to protect myself and my family from his assaults. What are you hitting him with?! He is millions of times stronger than you! And he hates you! And your family, and your marriage, and  this church and God. How anyone walks through this devil-ruled world without a sword in their hand is beyond me."